Post by Free on Sept 12, 2020 16:43:24 GMT -5
A dagger pierced Desiree’s heart for every syllable of Americanized Russian Brooklyn said. All the words were right, but Brooklyn’s mouth tripped over some of the coordinations.
That language belonged to her and Logan. How could he share that with anyone else? It was bad enough he’d been acting so weird lately. It was bad enough he’d made out with Chad, when she’d been so sure he was completely straight. What else in their friendship was a lie? It was bad enough he didn’t seem to want to spend any of this weekend with her all of a sudden. But this? Sharing their private, secret thing, letting Brooklyn in on something that was supposed to be wholly theirs?
Maybe that’s why he’d been acting so weird lately…Maybe he and Brooklyn are a thing and he’s too much of a little b**** to tell me. Even thinking the words didn’t make any of this feel more real. Other girls, any other girls never got between them. Ever. She really thought she knew Logan, her Logan. Nothing made sense anymore. Maybe to Brooklyn this was all just a funny game, but she’d taken everything way too far.
Above her, the sky was darkening along with her mood.
She looked the door when she got to her room. There was no one she wanted to talk to right now. She curled into a ball on their bed, but she couldn’t cry. None of it felt real. She gasped for breath. How could he do this? She clutched a hand to her chest, trying to press away all the pain.
There was only one person in the whole world who knew how to make her feel better, but he was no where to be found.
Someone knocked softly on the door. When she didn’t answer, the knocking returned, this time without end.
“Get the f*** out here!” she screamed.
“Desi?” Destiny called from the other side of the door.
Desiree sighed, launched herself off the bed and opened the door.
“What?” she snapped.
“Can I come in?” Destiny said gently.
“Is it going to matter if I say no?”
Destiny locked the door behind her. She surveyed the room.
“Do you guys ever open the drapes?” Destiny asked with a small smile.
“What do you want?”
“Are you okay?”
Desiree considered not answering, but Destiny already knew the answer.
“No,” she said finally. “Logan’s an ass. Actually, that word doesn’t even begin to describe him...”
Destiny laughed. “No argument from me.”
“He really stooped to a new low this time. Honestly, I’d never have believed it if I wasn’t watching it for myself.”
“People are complicated.” Destiny sat on the bed and motioned for her sister to join her.
“Are you defending him?”
“Of course not! I’m always on your side.”
Desiree sunk into the bed next to her sister and rested her head on Destiny’s shoulder.
“I’m going to kill him,” Desiree said after a long moment. The story tumbled out of her, every awful detail, just like it always did when she was around Destiny. Something about spending your entire life, before and after birth, with someone made you close.
“I certainly am not going to try and defend his behavior this weekend, but if there’s one thing I know about Logan, it’s that you’re the most important person in his world. Nobody even comes close.”
“That’s what I thought….but now? How could he do that?”
“I’m gonna find out,” Destiny said, standing up.
“No, you’re not.” Desiree sighed. “All I want to do is get out of here, okay?”
Destiny looked at her for a long moment, “Okay. Let me just tell Alex and grab my stuff.”
Brooklyn watched the interaction between Logan as her and Desiree. As mad as she was at him, it hurt to watch. She’d never paid much attention to the gentle way he approached her. She imagined maybe his voice even sounded softer when he talked to her when they were alone.
She was about to offer to help him when Westley appeared. She instinctively moved toward him. Then Logan shouted and Westley stood there with the worst expression she’d ever seen. He felt so far away and he was hurting… She’d never missed him more in her entire life.
Would he believe me? She wondered.
She walked up to him.
“Hey…” she said.
“Logan, I am not in the mood.” He started back toward the house.
Thunder rumbled in the distance. She wondered if she stood outside long enough, if lightning would strike her again and this whole nightmare would be over. Sure, people would miss her, but… Where was all this coming from? She wasn’t mopy, moody or depressed. Maybe there was something wrong with Logan’s hormones. Maybe he’d be in a better mood if–
“Westley, wait!” she called after him. She raced to catch up to him and just made it under the roof covering the porch before rain started falling heavily from the sky. In a matter of seconds, she could barely see the lake.
Westley kept walking and she followed him inside.
“Westley…” she said hesitantly, “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
Before he could answer, Destiny swept in and grabbed her by the arm.
“We need to talk,” Destiny said, her tone clipped.
Oh my god! What did Logan do now?
Brooklyn felt helpless watching Westley walk away. With her new size, Destiny couldn’t make her move, but she knew Logan would be way more interested in whatever Destiny was about to say because it was probably about Desiree than anything he could possibly talk to Westley about.
She wanted to scream. This had gone on long enough. All she wanted was to get back to herself. Her heart ached as Westley disappeared around a corner.
She let Destiny drag her away. She didn’t care that it was obviously for a lecture. She didn’t care about whatever Logan had stepped in this time. For the first time, she just didn’t care.
Destiny sat them down in the living rooms in one of the big picture window seats. She was talking, but Brooklyn couldn’t hear her over the scene she’d just watched. Westley’s face, that look of hurt played over and over in her head.
“Are you even listening?” Destiny was glaring at him. She looked a lot more like Desiree in that moment than Brooklyn had ever seen.
Brooklyn didn’t know what to say to that.
“She’s leaving, Logan! And I don’t know if she’ll come back this time.” She sighed. She rubbed her forehead. “If you care about her, you’ll stop screwing around with Brooklyn and fix this.”
Brooklyn swallowed hard. She wanted to cry but Logan didn’t cry.
“I know you care about her,” Destiny said softly. “Even if what you did today was so unbelievably stupid...” She paused. “I don’t know if that was supposed to be a joke, but I hope it was.”
With one final look, she disappeared. Brooklyn leaned back against the frame. For once, she was at a loss for words.
~
Brooklyn knocked on Desiree’s door. Part of her couldn’t believe she was actually standing here instead of trying to convince Westley to believe something so completely insane he would probably have her committed...well, Logan technically.
She closed her eyes. She was surprised when Desiree answered. Desiree moved to close the door when she saw Logan’s face, but Brooklyn put her foot in the way, blocking the door.
She was surprised when Desiree didn’t fight or argue, she just turned and walked away. Brooklyn took that as an invitation and let herself in, closing the door behind her. She took a deep breath. What did Desiree need to hear?
“I’m sorry,” she said. She let the words hang in the air for a moment. Desiree looked like she was packing. Logan and Desiree never brought much, there was always tons of stuff at each of their houses, but Desiree was putting a couple books, a charm bracelet and a few other things in a small bag.
Brooklyn felt like she was intruding in such a private moment. All of Desiree’s most special things were going in that bag while she watched.
“Dez,” Brooklyn said, using Logan’s nickname for her. He walked over to her and reached out to pull her chin so Desiree would look at her. “Please look at me.”
Desiree pulled away.
It is nearly impossible to apologize for something when you don’t know what you did. Brooklyn wished she’d been able to hear what Logan had said to Desiree...or had been at all paying attention to Destiny’s lecture.
“That was ours,” Desiree said softly.
Brooklyn wished Desiree would elaborate, but she was so scared if she asked, it would make things worse. She took another deep breath.
“What was ours?”
Desiree’s lips formed a thin line as a crease formed along her forehead.
“Russian, Logan! Don’t play dumb with me!”
Brooklyn winced. Oh my god, Logan you idiot! He was so worried she’d screw everything up for him, but he was doing a pretty good job by all himself.
Brooklyn tried to come up with a reason why “Brooklyn” would have spoken to her in Russian, but she drew a blank. She decided maybe if she started talking, something would come to her.
“I didn’t teach her.” Brooklyn paused. She couldn’t be sure, but it seemed like maybe Desiree was listening.
Desiree snorted. “So what? She just picked it up somewhere?!”
Brooklyn decided this was the right moment to channel some of her anger at Logan.
“How the hell should I know?”
“You except me to believe—“
“Dez, that’s our thing. Why would I ever take that away?” Brooklyn tried to think about what she’d want Westley or James to do if there had been a misunderstanding. Brooklyn pulled Desiree toward her, and this time, Desiree let her. Brooklyn wrapped both arms around Desiree and Desiree rested her head in Brooklyn’s chest.
Brooklyn was taken aback by how much Desiree trusted Logan. She didn’t think Desiree trusted anybody that much.
She tried not to think about how weird this whole scenario was and focus on being Logan. Not for him, but because none of this was fair to Desiree. Under different circumstances, she might have found it amusing, but nothing was even remotely funny right now.
Brooklyn hesitated, then kissed Desiree’s forehead lightly. She stroked Desiree’s hair. She loved it when Westley did that when she was upset.
“You know Brooklyn, she probably thought it’d be funny...”
Desiree stiffened.
Oh my god...she’s gonna throw me out, isn’t she?
“I’ll talk to her, don’t worry,” Brooklyn said.
“That’s not enough,” Desiree said.
“I know, but it’s storming again...so...”
“So?”
When Brooklyn didn’t respond, Desiree just shook her head and walked off to toward the bathroom. Brooklyn couldn’t tell if she was supposed to follow her or what.
“I’ll talk to her. It was way out of line!” Brooklyn said.
“I can fight my own battles—”
“I know you can...” Brooklyn hesitated, not quite sure where to go from there, “It bothers me too, okay? I’m talking to her for me.”
Desiree was quiet after that. Brooklyn wished she could feel things the way she usually could, tell if things were okay.
Brooklyn walked up to the bathroom. Desiree was filling the enormous bath with the water. She was mostly naked. Brooklyn backed out of the room, hoping Desiree hadn’t seen her.
“Where are you going?” Desiree called after to her.
Brooklyn swallowed. There was a lot of stuff she would do for those she loved, but this is where she drew the line.
“I’m ending this.” Brooklyn said, “Now.”
Brooklyn rushed out of the room, her heart pounding. Opening the door, she knocked her body out of the way. Apparently Logan was eavesdropping.
“Leave her alone, Logan,” Brooklyn said. Her voice was weary and sad. “You just about destroyed your relationship. And she’s just about to kick ‘Brooklyn’ out for being wildly out of line. You’re lucky there’s a storm.”
She kept walking. Logan tried to stop her, but there was nothing standing between her and the two best people she knew. She had the bigger body this time. She turned back for a moment, her voice soft, “Don’t worry, Logan. She doesn’t hate you anymore....just me.”
She found Westley by himself in their room. She ached at the sight of him. She missed him and James so much, even though they’d practically been together the whole trip, it wasn’t the same watching from a distance. They were so far away.
She dropped onto the bed next to Westley without invitation. Maybe Logan was rubbing off on her.
“Can I tell you something you’ll never believe?” She asked.
“What do you want, Logan?” Westley looked mad.
Whatever Logan had done obviously hadn’t worked with Desiree. Brooklyn needed a different tactic.
“What is some stuff Brooklyn would never do?” Brooklyn asked, “Snub you for no reason. Yell at you, for no reason. Drink until she can’t remember her name. Spend all of her time chasing after Desiree...” Brooklyn sighed, hoping he would hear her. “What is some stuff Brooklyn would do? Be there for her friends? Snuggle? Make out with a guy at a party, but probably not sleep with him...”
She dropped her head into her hands. There’s no way he’d believe her.
”There you are!” A smile flashed a crossed his features. James passed a deflated looking Logan. He wondered briefly if he should say something to Logan, but as weird as he’d been acting lately, it probably wasn’t worth the trouble. He and grabbed Brooklyn, picked her up and spun her around, then pinned her between him and the wall. He cupped her chin in one hand, his other on the small of her back, closed his eyes and bent down to kiss her.
That language belonged to her and Logan. How could he share that with anyone else? It was bad enough he’d been acting so weird lately. It was bad enough he’d made out with Chad, when she’d been so sure he was completely straight. What else in their friendship was a lie? It was bad enough he didn’t seem to want to spend any of this weekend with her all of a sudden. But this? Sharing their private, secret thing, letting Brooklyn in on something that was supposed to be wholly theirs?
Maybe that’s why he’d been acting so weird lately…Maybe he and Brooklyn are a thing and he’s too much of a little b**** to tell me. Even thinking the words didn’t make any of this feel more real. Other girls, any other girls never got between them. Ever. She really thought she knew Logan, her Logan. Nothing made sense anymore. Maybe to Brooklyn this was all just a funny game, but she’d taken everything way too far.
Above her, the sky was darkening along with her mood.
She looked the door when she got to her room. There was no one she wanted to talk to right now. She curled into a ball on their bed, but she couldn’t cry. None of it felt real. She gasped for breath. How could he do this? She clutched a hand to her chest, trying to press away all the pain.
There was only one person in the whole world who knew how to make her feel better, but he was no where to be found.
Someone knocked softly on the door. When she didn’t answer, the knocking returned, this time without end.
“Get the f*** out here!” she screamed.
“Desi?” Destiny called from the other side of the door.
Desiree sighed, launched herself off the bed and opened the door.
“What?” she snapped.
“Can I come in?” Destiny said gently.
“Is it going to matter if I say no?”
Destiny locked the door behind her. She surveyed the room.
“Do you guys ever open the drapes?” Destiny asked with a small smile.
“What do you want?”
“Are you okay?”
Desiree considered not answering, but Destiny already knew the answer.
“No,” she said finally. “Logan’s an ass. Actually, that word doesn’t even begin to describe him...”
Destiny laughed. “No argument from me.”
“He really stooped to a new low this time. Honestly, I’d never have believed it if I wasn’t watching it for myself.”
“People are complicated.” Destiny sat on the bed and motioned for her sister to join her.
“Are you defending him?”
“Of course not! I’m always on your side.”
Desiree sunk into the bed next to her sister and rested her head on Destiny’s shoulder.
“I’m going to kill him,” Desiree said after a long moment. The story tumbled out of her, every awful detail, just like it always did when she was around Destiny. Something about spending your entire life, before and after birth, with someone made you close.
“I certainly am not going to try and defend his behavior this weekend, but if there’s one thing I know about Logan, it’s that you’re the most important person in his world. Nobody even comes close.”
“That’s what I thought….but now? How could he do that?”
“I’m gonna find out,” Destiny said, standing up.
“No, you’re not.” Desiree sighed. “All I want to do is get out of here, okay?”
Destiny looked at her for a long moment, “Okay. Let me just tell Alex and grab my stuff.”
Brooklyn watched the interaction between Logan as her and Desiree. As mad as she was at him, it hurt to watch. She’d never paid much attention to the gentle way he approached her. She imagined maybe his voice even sounded softer when he talked to her when they were alone.
She was about to offer to help him when Westley appeared. She instinctively moved toward him. Then Logan shouted and Westley stood there with the worst expression she’d ever seen. He felt so far away and he was hurting… She’d never missed him more in her entire life.
Would he believe me? She wondered.
She walked up to him.
“Hey…” she said.
“Logan, I am not in the mood.” He started back toward the house.
Thunder rumbled in the distance. She wondered if she stood outside long enough, if lightning would strike her again and this whole nightmare would be over. Sure, people would miss her, but… Where was all this coming from? She wasn’t mopy, moody or depressed. Maybe there was something wrong with Logan’s hormones. Maybe he’d be in a better mood if–
“Westley, wait!” she called after him. She raced to catch up to him and just made it under the roof covering the porch before rain started falling heavily from the sky. In a matter of seconds, she could barely see the lake.
Westley kept walking and she followed him inside.
“Westley…” she said hesitantly, “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
Before he could answer, Destiny swept in and grabbed her by the arm.
“We need to talk,” Destiny said, her tone clipped.
Oh my god! What did Logan do now?
Brooklyn felt helpless watching Westley walk away. With her new size, Destiny couldn’t make her move, but she knew Logan would be way more interested in whatever Destiny was about to say because it was probably about Desiree than anything he could possibly talk to Westley about.
She wanted to scream. This had gone on long enough. All she wanted was to get back to herself. Her heart ached as Westley disappeared around a corner.
She let Destiny drag her away. She didn’t care that it was obviously for a lecture. She didn’t care about whatever Logan had stepped in this time. For the first time, she just didn’t care.
Destiny sat them down in the living rooms in one of the big picture window seats. She was talking, but Brooklyn couldn’t hear her over the scene she’d just watched. Westley’s face, that look of hurt played over and over in her head.
“Are you even listening?” Destiny was glaring at him. She looked a lot more like Desiree in that moment than Brooklyn had ever seen.
Brooklyn didn’t know what to say to that.
“She’s leaving, Logan! And I don’t know if she’ll come back this time.” She sighed. She rubbed her forehead. “If you care about her, you’ll stop screwing around with Brooklyn and fix this.”
Brooklyn swallowed hard. She wanted to cry but Logan didn’t cry.
“I know you care about her,” Destiny said softly. “Even if what you did today was so unbelievably stupid...” She paused. “I don’t know if that was supposed to be a joke, but I hope it was.”
With one final look, she disappeared. Brooklyn leaned back against the frame. For once, she was at a loss for words.
~
Brooklyn knocked on Desiree’s door. Part of her couldn’t believe she was actually standing here instead of trying to convince Westley to believe something so completely insane he would probably have her committed...well, Logan technically.
She closed her eyes. She was surprised when Desiree answered. Desiree moved to close the door when she saw Logan’s face, but Brooklyn put her foot in the way, blocking the door.
She was surprised when Desiree didn’t fight or argue, she just turned and walked away. Brooklyn took that as an invitation and let herself in, closing the door behind her. She took a deep breath. What did Desiree need to hear?
“I’m sorry,” she said. She let the words hang in the air for a moment. Desiree looked like she was packing. Logan and Desiree never brought much, there was always tons of stuff at each of their houses, but Desiree was putting a couple books, a charm bracelet and a few other things in a small bag.
Brooklyn felt like she was intruding in such a private moment. All of Desiree’s most special things were going in that bag while she watched.
“Dez,” Brooklyn said, using Logan’s nickname for her. He walked over to her and reached out to pull her chin so Desiree would look at her. “Please look at me.”
Desiree pulled away.
It is nearly impossible to apologize for something when you don’t know what you did. Brooklyn wished she’d been able to hear what Logan had said to Desiree...or had been at all paying attention to Destiny’s lecture.
“That was ours,” Desiree said softly.
Brooklyn wished Desiree would elaborate, but she was so scared if she asked, it would make things worse. She took another deep breath.
“What was ours?”
Desiree’s lips formed a thin line as a crease formed along her forehead.
“Russian, Logan! Don’t play dumb with me!”
Brooklyn winced. Oh my god, Logan you idiot! He was so worried she’d screw everything up for him, but he was doing a pretty good job by all himself.
Brooklyn tried to come up with a reason why “Brooklyn” would have spoken to her in Russian, but she drew a blank. She decided maybe if she started talking, something would come to her.
“I didn’t teach her.” Brooklyn paused. She couldn’t be sure, but it seemed like maybe Desiree was listening.
Desiree snorted. “So what? She just picked it up somewhere?!”
Brooklyn decided this was the right moment to channel some of her anger at Logan.
“How the hell should I know?”
“You except me to believe—“
“Dez, that’s our thing. Why would I ever take that away?” Brooklyn tried to think about what she’d want Westley or James to do if there had been a misunderstanding. Brooklyn pulled Desiree toward her, and this time, Desiree let her. Brooklyn wrapped both arms around Desiree and Desiree rested her head in Brooklyn’s chest.
Brooklyn was taken aback by how much Desiree trusted Logan. She didn’t think Desiree trusted anybody that much.
She tried not to think about how weird this whole scenario was and focus on being Logan. Not for him, but because none of this was fair to Desiree. Under different circumstances, she might have found it amusing, but nothing was even remotely funny right now.
Brooklyn hesitated, then kissed Desiree’s forehead lightly. She stroked Desiree’s hair. She loved it when Westley did that when she was upset.
“You know Brooklyn, she probably thought it’d be funny...”
Desiree stiffened.
Oh my god...she’s gonna throw me out, isn’t she?
“I’ll talk to her, don’t worry,” Brooklyn said.
“That’s not enough,” Desiree said.
“I know, but it’s storming again...so...”
“So?”
When Brooklyn didn’t respond, Desiree just shook her head and walked off to toward the bathroom. Brooklyn couldn’t tell if she was supposed to follow her or what.
“I’ll talk to her. It was way out of line!” Brooklyn said.
“I can fight my own battles—”
“I know you can...” Brooklyn hesitated, not quite sure where to go from there, “It bothers me too, okay? I’m talking to her for me.”
Desiree was quiet after that. Brooklyn wished she could feel things the way she usually could, tell if things were okay.
Brooklyn walked up to the bathroom. Desiree was filling the enormous bath with the water. She was mostly naked. Brooklyn backed out of the room, hoping Desiree hadn’t seen her.
“Where are you going?” Desiree called after to her.
Brooklyn swallowed. There was a lot of stuff she would do for those she loved, but this is where she drew the line.
“I’m ending this.” Brooklyn said, “Now.”
Brooklyn rushed out of the room, her heart pounding. Opening the door, she knocked her body out of the way. Apparently Logan was eavesdropping.
“Leave her alone, Logan,” Brooklyn said. Her voice was weary and sad. “You just about destroyed your relationship. And she’s just about to kick ‘Brooklyn’ out for being wildly out of line. You’re lucky there’s a storm.”
She kept walking. Logan tried to stop her, but there was nothing standing between her and the two best people she knew. She had the bigger body this time. She turned back for a moment, her voice soft, “Don’t worry, Logan. She doesn’t hate you anymore....just me.”
She found Westley by himself in their room. She ached at the sight of him. She missed him and James so much, even though they’d practically been together the whole trip, it wasn’t the same watching from a distance. They were so far away.
She dropped onto the bed next to Westley without invitation. Maybe Logan was rubbing off on her.
“Can I tell you something you’ll never believe?” She asked.
“What do you want, Logan?” Westley looked mad.
Whatever Logan had done obviously hadn’t worked with Desiree. Brooklyn needed a different tactic.
“What is some stuff Brooklyn would never do?” Brooklyn asked, “Snub you for no reason. Yell at you, for no reason. Drink until she can’t remember her name. Spend all of her time chasing after Desiree...” Brooklyn sighed, hoping he would hear her. “What is some stuff Brooklyn would do? Be there for her friends? Snuggle? Make out with a guy at a party, but probably not sleep with him...”
She dropped her head into her hands. There’s no way he’d believe her.
”There you are!” A smile flashed a crossed his features. James passed a deflated looking Logan. He wondered briefly if he should say something to Logan, but as weird as he’d been acting lately, it probably wasn’t worth the trouble. He and grabbed Brooklyn, picked her up and spun her around, then pinned her between him and the wall. He cupped her chin in one hand, his other on the small of her back, closed his eyes and bent down to kiss her.