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Post by Free on Oct 6, 2020 21:32:28 GMT -5
Her father was sitting on the edge of her desk when she walked into her office. She glanced at the sign on her door almost as a joke to herself, before closing it behind her. She could count the number of times he’d been in her office on one hand.
“I wanted to know if you’d be at the meeting tomorrow,” he said.
Desiree watched her father stand as she approached. He didn’t need to ask her that. That’s what assistants are for. She didn’t even know what meeting he was talking about.
“Do I need to be there?”
“I thought…” He was quiet for a long time, just looking at her.
She wondered what he was thinking. He hadn’t called or anything since she’d been kidnapped, but it wasn’t like she’d been expecting him to call. Maybe he’d come to say he was glad she was back, glad she wasn’t dead.
He shook his head. “I thought your unique perspective would be an asset to the merger discussion.”
She nodded. Of course. It’d been too long for them. One dinner couldn’t change their entire relationship. What surprised her wasn’t that he was pretending nothing had happened, it was that she cared. That she’d actually wanted him to care.
“Of course,” she said, forcing a smile.
“I need my secret weapon.” He was smiling now too.
He probably meant he needed her, at least that’s what she was hoping he meant. Her heart ached. It was stupid, but Logan had never made her guess where she stood with him and she missed him and that clarity.
“That’s my girl,” he said. He stood there awkwardly for a moment and then walked out, closing her door behind him. She could have hugged him. He would have hugged her back, but she wanted him to start it this time. She’d made the effort last time.
Desiree dropped into the chair behind her desk.
How can everything be the same when nothing is?
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Post by Free on Oct 9, 2020 15:53:08 GMT -5
Desiree: Hey.
She wasn’t sure what to say. She hoped that if she just started a conversation, it would flow naturally, like it always did.
Jase: Hey, Sunshine!
She smiled as she immediately read the text, then dropped her phone on coffee table and stared out the big windows taking up all the exterior walls of her living room. Now what? She didn’t want to seem like she didn’t have other things to do, even if that was true.
A few minutes later, he texted her again.
Jase: You miss me. I’m like a drug. You’re hooked.
Desiree rolled her eyes, but found herself smiling anyway.
Jase: It’s okay. You can say it. It happens all the time.
She clicked something on her phone to reply and it dialed him instead.
“See? I knew you couldn’t keep away.” There was laughter in his voice.
“You wanna do something tonight?” she asked.
“Wait. Can you repeat that so I can record Desiree Storm asking me out?”
“I’m not asking you out, Jase.” She sighed, more for his benefit, so he wouldn’t know how much she wanted to see him.
“It’s so hard not to.”
“You are so full of yourself!” She laughed.
“You love it.”
“I do.” She covered her mouth with her hand. Damnit. What did I just say? She rubbed her face. Hopefully, he wouldn’t comment on it.
He laughed
“Sorry to disappoint, but I’m otherwise occupied,” he said.
“Another one of your party friends?” she asked. She wasn’t jealous. There was nothing to be jealous of. And this was Jase. Jase. The guy who wandered in and out of her life over the years and never took anything too seriously.
“It’s actually more the commute I worried about...”
“The 5 minutes from your downtown loft to my penthouse?”
“Always showing me up. That’s a huge turn on, by the way,” he said sarcastically.
She hadn’t meant it like that.
“No, I’m taking that vacation I promised myself. I’m currently on a gorgeous beach with and even more beautiful woman.”
Desiree heard someone giggling in the background. He was such a flirt. This had been a bad idea.
“Bye,” she said quickly.
“No, wait D—”
She ended the call before he could finish his sentence.
What is wrong with me?
She was lonely. That was the problem. It’d been seven months since she’d slept with anyone and with the exception of the week Jase invited himself to stay, she slept alone. She spent her days alone.
Does it get easier? Maybe. She couldn’t believe it, but she could almost see why her dad spent his entire life at the office. It was less complicated. And it filled up his time so wouldn’t have any left to think about what he’d lost.
Maybe she just needed someone wildly uncomplicated to take her mind off things for a while. Jase was out of the question. That’s how things had gotten so screwed up with Logan. She’d let him in too far and now everything was broken.
No, she needed to leave Jase alone for a while. Get some space. Come back when her head had cleared. If it ever did.
She sighed and dropped back on the seat of the couch, looking up at the ceiling.
Not for the first time, she wished things were different, that she could take some things back. But wishing didn’t change reality, didn’t change her. And she was the problem.
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Post by Free on Oct 15, 2020 21:28:42 GMT -5
“So Ace tells me you’re a prude,” Desiree said, smiling at Harper. Dinner was winding down. She’d played along for the most part, but it was hard watching them.
Ace always had an arm around Harper, a hand on her knee, his lips on hers. And they’d both had the same stupid smile on their face the whole dinner. What was she supposed to do? Watch?
Harper glanced at Ace, then back. “I’m sorry?”
“Harper, Honey, why don’t you go ask the waiter for a dessert menu?” Ace said, his voice soft. It was like that when he was talking to her. What was wrong with him? They stared at each other, maybe having one of those secret conversations she used to have with Logan because Harper just smiled and got up from the table.
When Harper was out of each shot, Ace glared at Desiree.
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“What do you mean? I was making conversation. I thought you wanted us to get to know each other.” Desiree took a long drink from her wine glass.
“So you wanted her to learn tonight that you’re a b*tch?” Ace rubbed his face with his hands. “I’m sorry, Desi.” He sighed. “I didn’t mean that.”
Desiree masked her surprise. “Yes, you did,” she said.
“Okay, I did but, I don’t get it. I thought we were all having fun.”
“We were…”
“And then?”
There was a time when she would have told him it was hard watching him be so happy with Harper. There was a time when she would have scooted closer to him and he would have given her a hug. That felt like a million years ago.
She looked out across the room. How long does it take someone to grab a menu?
Ace scooted next to her. “I know it’s weird. We’re all grown up and I’m engaged. When the last time you saw me, I was swearing my beard was coming in when we both knew that was years away…”
He took a deep breath, then slipped an arm around her shoulders. He looked into her eyes.
“Are you about to kiss me? With your fiancée–”
“Stop it. That’s so gross!”
It was, but he was getting way too serious.
He withdrew his arm, dropping into his lap.
“I want us to be close,” he said, “Like we used to be. Why can’t we?”
Because you have something I don’t? Can never have? No. That was fine. She was fine. At least, maybe if she kept telling herself that, she would be. This whole thing was exceedingly stupid.
She looked down at her plate for a long a moment.
“I don’t know how.” It was the most honest thing she’d said all night.
~
Music pounded through wall-mounted speakers. Light danced around the room. Desiree’s head spun a little as she took it all in. The DJ was good tonight, but then they always were at Centurion. The club name came from the fact that you had to have one of those cards or better to get through the doors. Desiree’s crystal card made her a VIP.
She’d already had a few drinks and was dancing when a guy came up to her. He was moderately attractive. They danced for a while, then he pulled her into a private booth. He ordered her a drink. She wasn’t listening when he ordered it. Everything here was good.
“I’ve heard of you,” he said, leaning in.
“Only bad things, I hope.” She was smiling, but not feeling it. She wasn’t entirely sure this was a good idea. It had just seemed like the only one that made any sense.
“Only the best.” He laughed. Then he started talking telling a story. She could tell by the way his eyes lit up that it was something important to him.
She found herself trying to remember if he’d said his name was Chris or Randy and counting down the seconds to the one where she got this out of the way.
It had been too long and getting over Logan meant replacing him as her last sexual partner. It wasn’t like the last time was even good. She’d just been so distant, trying to pretend things were okay for a moment and–she’d had to have been out of her mind, right?–that it’d been miserable. If he hadn’t already had a hundred other clues, that would have been a big one since it was always good with them. The best, actually.
“So you wanna get out of here?” He leaned toward her. He had this look on his face that she assumed he thought was sexy.
Finally, the words she’d been waiting for all night.
Since there was no way she was taking him home, she let Jacob drive her to this guy’s house. Owen wouldn’t have approved of that idea, if he’d been allowed to come along for the ride. She wasn’t worried. She could handle herself against drunk strangers and she could summon Jacob with the press of a button. He’d be waiting outside anyway.
Walking through the door, she felt in her element. This guy’s taste could use some improvement. He was clearly trying to hard with the art on the walls and furniture designer he’d chosen. I mean, it was like screaming, “I’m rich, see ladies? Impressive, right?” He had to be new money.
“Man, I might need to get my own driver,” the guy said. “That was pretty cool. Way better than Uber. Was he just waiting out there for you the whole time?”
“Something like that.” Desiree ran her hand over his couch. It was black leather, Robertson. While it worth almost as much as assumed most people spent on their cars ($25,000), it wasn’t custom like hers.
He put an arm around her waist, pulling her into him. He pressed his lips to hers and she kissed him back. He pulled her over to the couch and into his lap. She let him.
He reached a hand up under her shirt and she shoved aside the urge to pull away. What is wrong with me? This guy’s cute in a gym rat kind of way. They made out for a while. Her mind kept wandering a hundred places she didn’t want to visit. All of them were Logan.
Eventually, the guy pulled her to her feet and walked her back to his bedroom. He pulled of his shirt, then reached for hers. She put at hand on his arm to stop him.
“Something wrong?” He was breathing heavily and his voice was husky.
“I have to go,” she said after a moment.
“What?” He pulled her toward him, wrapping his arms around her. “Stay. The night’s just getting started.” He kissed a line down the side of her neck.
It was almost working. Almost. God. What is wrong with me? This guy’s hot. I’m single and it’s not like I haven’t done this before.
He reached for her shirt again and this time she restrained the urge to stop him. This was happening. Better just get it over with and then she could move on. He pulled her on top of him onto the bed.
She paused at that thought. Get it over with? Sex was supposed to be fun. This was decidedly not.
She stood, picked her shirt off the floor and walked out of the room.
She ignored his questions, the way he was calling after her. He followed her to the door.
“Good night,” she said, kissing him on the cheek, her way of apologizing.
“Wait. Baby. Why are you leaving?”
She gritted her teeth at the pet name.
“Good night,” she said again, leaving him standing at his door, watching her walk down the hall.
“You can’t just leave me like this!” he called after her.
~
She pressed her forehead into the cool glass of her new new Tesla X. She’d pulled her shirt back on as she’d climbed in. Jacob drove in silence, something she appreciated about him.
She’d never had this problem before. Sex was fun, a release, the best part of a party, ask anyone.
What the hell is wrong with me?
Desiree: I need something to make me forget this whole night. Please don’t say no this time.
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Post by Free on Oct 16, 2020 19:34:59 GMT -5
Jase was lounging on her couch when she walked through the door. He breezed toward her, all smiles.
“Miss me?” he asked, beaming.
Desiree rolled her eyes. “What are you doing here, Jase?” Her mind was still fuzzy from the club and she wasn’t in the mood for guests.
“I missed you, Sunshine!” He hugged her, then pulled back. “What do you think of my tan?”
She gave him a look.
“Fine, you said, ‘please.’ It sounded like an emergency. So here I am.”
“I didn’t ask you to come.” Desiree walked past him, but he grabbed her arm.
“Actually, you did. You asked me to bring you something.”
She turned to face him, unmasked surprise written all over her face. “You brought me something?”
There was a long moment of silence where Jase looked somewhat uncomfortable.
“No,” he said, finally. “I meant what I said the first time… Not even for one hundred times street value.” He winked at her.
“Then why are you here?” Desiree crossed her arms.
“You didn’t answer my question. I spent a great deal of time perfecting my ta–”
Desiree closed the last step between them. She reached up and grabbed his face with one hand, her fingers running through his hair. She leaned up and kissed him.
He froze for a moment, clearly surprised, before kissing her back. She increased the intensity. He pulled back after a moment.
“I know I’m going to regret asking, but what is happening?” he asked.
Instead of answering, Desiree continued kissing him. He wrapped his arms around her.
After a while, he picked her up, princess style, and carried her off to her bedroom.
She pulled off his shirt. She didn’t stop him when he took off hers and pulled her onto the bed.
Everything felt so different than it had earlier in the night. It was likely she was going to regret this tomorrow, but tonight, it felt right. Maybe the first thing that had in a really long time.
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Post by Free on Oct 19, 2020 16:48:27 GMT -5
Desiree groaned and opened her eyes. Her head pounded. God. This is why I drink Powerade. She reached over to see if Jase was still there, but the sheets were cool. She covered her face with her hand. That was either the most amazing thing to happen in months or the third stupidest thing she’d ever done.
No, this was Jase, the guy who hooked up at every party he’d ever attended. There was no way he’d make a big deal about this. The fact that she’d been about to, was crazy.
She threw on a pajama top and clean panties and dropped onto her living room couch.
“Hang over meds,” she groaned. “And close the drapes.”
Jase’s head appeared over the couch.
“You feeling okay?” His tone danced between sarcasm and amusement. He brushed some of the hair out of her face.
She closed her eyes and lazily batted his hand away.
“No.”
The room darkened and she opened her eyes just as Evan handed her two small pills and a glass of water. She quickly swallowed the pills and set the glass on the coffee table.
Jase jumped over to her side of the couch and she cringed as the movement jarred her. He placed her head in his lap.
“How are you in this good of a mood?” she asked.
“Maybe because I didn’t drink half the bar last night?”
"It wasn't halt the bar," she said. "I finish what I start."
He laughed.
She peeked at him with one eye. He was still smiling at her.
“Stop it,” she said.
“What?” He laughed.
“You’re enjoying this too much.”
“Mmm…maybe. Was about to invite the band to practice here this morning…”
“You’re not in a band.” She stuck her tongue out at him and rolled onto her side, facing away from him.
“You don’t know that!”
“Too loud,” she groaned.
“Sorry,” he whispered, “You don’t know that.”
“Why are you still here, anyway? Don’t you have ‘work’ or something?” she asked.
“That’s the beauty of my job. I can be anywhere.” He ran a hand over hair. “You’re the one that’s late to work.”
“Shut up.”
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Post by Free on Oct 26, 2020 22:22:44 GMT -5
Desiree looked up from the road as a car sped past her on the left. She did a double take as she realized it was another DBS Superlaggera Volante, but where her’s was the darkest blue, Ultramarine Black, this one was an ostentatious Yellow Tang. She smiled and hit the accelerator. Her car took the mountain road’s turns with ease.
Yellow Tang pulled in front of her just as an oncoming car appeared in Desiree’s narrow field of vision. At the next straightaway, Desiree hit the accelerator hard and zipped ahead. She glanced back, chuckling. Yellow Tang made another move to pass her, but Desiree sped up. Both cars could go from 0 to 62 in 3.6 seconds, so it all came down to handling.
The two cars danced for miles on the winding mountain road. When Desiree reached Alice’s Restaurant, this hole-in-the-wall, she pulled into the parking lot. To her surprise, Yellow Tang parked beside her.
The door opened and out stepped a girl about her age with gorgeous tight, black curls. Her tank was the same color as her car and looked just as expensive.
“Guess I owe you lunch!” she said.
“Guess so.”
Desiree was surprised when Yellow Tang followed her inside and asked for a table for two. That wasn’t a joke? Desiree looked around the restaurant. For as out of the way as this place was, it was packed.
“Actually, I’d like my own table,” Desiree said as the hostess picked up two menus. The hostess froze, clearly unsure if Desiree was serious.
“We’re pretty busy right now. I have only one table available. If you wanted to wait, it’s gonna be least forty–“
“She doesn’t,” Yellow Tang said, smiling.
Desiree was torn. She didn’t want to have lunch with anyone, especially not a stranger, but she was also hungry and she didn’t do waiting. She also didn’t do people talking for her.
The hostess glanced at Desiree, as if double checking, before showing them to the last remaining table, which overlooked the patio.
“I’m Blair,” the girl said, sitting down.
“Desiree.” Desiree sat across from her and looked out the window at the trees. She’d driven all the way out here to get away from everything and everyone. She needed to clear her head. Yellow Tang didn’t seem to be taking the hint.
“Nice car.” Blair crossed her arms on the table. She was studying Desiree and Desiree didn’t like it.
“You’re not very friendly for someone getting a free meal.”
“I don’t need you to buy me lunch,” Desiree said, trying to keep the edge out of her voice.
“Obviously.” Blair laughed.
In spite of herself, Desiree smiled.
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Post by Free on Oct 27, 2020 14:50:54 GMT -5
“You seeing anyone?” Blair asked, wiping her mouth with a napkin.
“I’m not into girls.” Desiree had been pointedly staring out the window the entire time she’d been sitting at the table, but Yellow Tang didn’t seem to taking the hint.
“Oh yeah. Totally. Me neither…most of the time.” Blair winked at Desiree.
Desiree kept her face neutral, not sure if this girl was hitting on her or just nosy.
After a moment of silence, Blair said, “You didn’t answer my question.”
“No.”
“You’re an open book. I love it!” Blair laughed. “I’m sort of seeing these three guys…”
“Sort of?” Desiree raised an eyebrow. How can you be “sort of” seeing people? And three sounded like a lot of work. She hadn’t even been successful at one. It was better to keep things simple.
“Yeah,” Blair said with a sigh. “I’m not really feelin’ it with any of them, but it’s way more fun than being single. Plus, I love the gifts!”
“That car a gift?” Desiree asked, trying to gauge whether Blair lived in her world or had gotten a visa from one or more of the guys she was dating.
“You mean Blitz?” Blair stabbed a fry with her fork.
“You named your car?” Desiree laughed.
“You didn’t?” Blair leaned forward, her mouth slightly. “And no. I don’t need anyone to buy me lunch either. But you have to admit, it’s nice when they do.”
Desiree had to admit, this girl had spunk.
“No, I’m not seeing anyone,” Desiree said after a pause. She set her hamburger back down on her plate.
“There’s a story there. I can tell,” Blair said. Then, after a pause, “But I can also tell from the look you’re giving me that you don’t kiss and tell.” She laughed. “You’re missing out!”
“On?”
“The whole reason to have girl friends! So you can dish about guys!”
“I’m good.”
“Wait. You’re not one of those girls who like…has no female friends, are you?” Blair set her fork down on the table and leaned toward Desiree with a very intense look on her face, like this was perhaps some kind of tragedy.
The reality was, Brooklyn had been Desiree’s only real female friend. She’d hung out in groups with other girls and they’d been invited to the parties she and Logan hosted, but that was about it. She’d just always gotten along better with guys.
“Of course I do,” Desiree said, looking her in directly in the eyes.
“Great! Guess you’ve got one more now.” Blair beamed at her.
Desiree found herself smiling back. This girl was weird, but in a good way.
When the check came, Blair dropped her crystal card down the table.
“Ever seen on of these?” she asked.
“No,” Desiree said, sliding hers across the table.
“We’re twins!” Blair said, sliding Desiree’s card back to her.
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Post by Free on Oct 27, 2020 20:20:51 GMT -5
Unknown: Hey!
Desiree: Who is this?
Unknown: Guess.
Desiree: Blocking you.
Unknown: It’s Blair. Has anyone ever told you you’re no fun?
Desiree: How’d you get my number?
Blair: Asked for it.
Desiree: You didn’t ask me.
Blair: Would you have given it to me if I had?
Desiree: No.
Blair: Exactly. You left me no choice.
Desiree: What do you want?
Blair: A bunch of us are flying to this private lake in Alberta. I’ll pick you up at 3:00 tomorrow.
Desiree reread the text. She must have misunderstood. There was no way Yellow Tang was inviting her on a vacation. They just met.
Desiree: No thanks.
Desiree closed her phone and set it on the edge of her tub and closed her eyes. Bubbles swirled around her, tickling her skin.
~
Desiree sat in Jase’s lap with her head on the armrest of her sectional. They were watching a movie Jase had promised would be epic. It was too soon to tell.
Jacob appeared off to one side of Desiree’s vision.
“There’s someone at the-” he said.
“Hey b*tch!”
Behind Desiree’s couch, Blair stood with a hand on her hip.
“So this is who you’re not seeing! I dunno why you were hiding him. He’s hot,” Blair said, leaning forward against the back of the couch toward Jase.
“So are you,” Jase said, winking at Blair.
“What are you doing here?” Desiree narrowed her eyes at Blair.
“Don’t take it personally. Desiree always get a little jeal-“ Jase said before Desiree shoved him. “-ous when it comes to me.” He raised his eye brows at Desiree, a big smile on his lips.
“Don’t say stuff like that. She doesn’t know you’re kidding,” Desiree said, moving to sit in her own space on the couch. Turning back to Blair, she asked, “What are you doing here?”
“It’s 3 o’clock!”
“No, it’s 5:30,” Desiree said, shaking her head.
“Close enough. You packed?”
“For?”
“Alberta? You, me, four of my best friends and a private lake. What better way to spend the weekend?”
“It’s Thursday,” Desiree corrected.
“Like I said, close enough.” Blair stood up. The collection of gold bracelets on her wrist clanked. “Don’t tell me you’re not packed!”
“I said I wasn’t going.”
“Is she always like this?” Blair asked, turning to Jase.
“As long as I’ve known her,” he said with a laugh. “Which is a really long time.”
“God. Now there’s two of you,” Desiree muttered.
“Am I invited?” Jase asked, leaning toward Blair and giving her one of those smiles that Desiree had seen turn girls at parties into puddles.
“You would be, if this weren’t a girls' a weekend,” Blair said, her tone flirty.
"Where the fun in that?" Jase asked.
"I know, right?" Blair laughed.
Desiree wasn’t exactly sure what about this scenario was bothering her, but something was. Beside the fact that this stranger had decided what she was doing this weekend without her.
“Jacob, could you prepare a lake weekend bag for Desiree?” Jase asked.
“Jacob, you take one step toward my room and you’re fired.”
Blair laughed. "We have SO much in common!"
Desiree fought the urge to have Blair thrown out. The truth was, a weekend lakeside with other women sounded like a nice change from spending it curled up alone with Netflix.
It wasn’t like she hadn’t seen the movies and briefly thought it would be nice to have some female friends, even if it wasn’t something she’d ever admitted out loud. It looked like fun. Bonus: things wouldn’t get complicated with girls, the way they always seemed to with guys. The biggest thing holding her back right then was that Blair had made this decision for her. People did not tell Desiree Storm what to do.
“I’ll be in the black Levante. I’m leaving in ten minutes. See you downstairs!” Blair blew a kiss and headed for the door.
Desiree’s heart ached at name of the SUV. Logan’s favorite car was also a Maserati. His was the MC20 in Rosso Vincente (red). Always a show off.
Once the door was closed, Jase pulled Desiree back into his lap.
“Why don’t you wanna go?” he asked.
Desiree sighed. “I do...”
Jase laughed. “Wait. Let me guess. You can’t stand that she’s telling you what to do.”
Desiree hit him with a decorative pillow.
“Are you really gonna let your pride stand in the way of a fun weekend?” He raised his eyebrows.
Desiree sighed again and rolled her eyes. There was no good answer for that. Nothing that didn’t make her sound unreasonable.
“Jacob? Please prepare a lakeside weekend bag for me.”
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Post by Free on Oct 28, 2020 17:29:51 GMT -5
Desiree climbed into the second row of Blair’s Levante as Jacob put her stuff in the back.
“Just so we’re clear: I came because I wanted to, not because the world revolves around you,” Desiree said.
“Whatever you need to tell yourself.” Blair laughed.
“Seriously, we’re going to get along a lot better if you don’t tell me what to do.”
“’Kay,” Blair said in a noncommittal tone while she scanned her iPhone. Dance music blasted from the speakers as Jacob shut the back of the SUV and they took off.
~
“What’s he doing here?” Desiree asked, nodding to the guy who was sprawled on the couch next to Chloe. “Is he one of the guys you’re sort of dating?”
Everyone laughed, including Noah.
“Aww. Are you jealous you couldn’t bring yours?” Blair asked.
Desiree rolled her eyes. “We’re not a couple.”
“Sure,” Blair said, all smiles. “That’s Noah. He’s one of my best girl friends!”
“As long as you don’t ask me to pick out your outfits, we’re going to get along great,” Noah said, winking at Desiree.
“Noah’s a lawyer—” Blair said.
“Which means I get to wear sexy suits every day and get paid to prove people wrong,” Noah said.
“—He defended Tory in a jaywalking case just out of college. The judge was trying to make an example of her, completely unfair. And we haven’t been able to get rid of him!” Blair laughed.
“Oh Honey, you know I am the group.”
“How does a lawyer get Friday off?” Desiree asked.
“When your daddy owns the firm!” Tory laughed.
~
Desiree watched the clouds outside the window in Blair’s jet. Everyone was drinking champagne and gathered in a sort of circle in the middle. Desiree was sitting just outside that circle, playing with her full champagne flute.
“Speaking of delicious things, Blair tells us you were hiding a super hot guy in your apartment!” Tory said, turning to Desiree.
Desiree shifted her attention to the group. All five of them were suddenly staring at her. Unlike Brooklyn, she didn’t want or need the spotlight.
“Yeah! What’s the story there?” Chloe asked, leaning toward Desiree.
“We’re just friends,” Desiree said, trying to keep her tone as level as possible. Was this all they were going to do all weekend? Gossip about guys like they were in high school?
“Yeah, I totally lay all over my guy ‘friends’ too,” Tory said, winking at her.
“Can I help it if none of your guy friends want to cuddle with you?” Desiree said, taking a sip of her champagne. Blair had good taste.
Everyone laughed.
“Sweetheart, where have you been all life?” Noah asked, laughing.
“Whatever,” Tory shrugged. “Or maybe she wants more than he does—”
“It’s not–”
“Oh my god, she’s blushing!” Chloe said.
Desiree’s mouth formed a thin line. She was not blushing. She wasn’t even thinking about Jase. She was reconsidering her decision to go on this trip.
“Oh leave her alone, guys. Nothing like being pounced on the second you walk on the plane,” Emma said, rolling her eyes.
“She’s hardly just walked on the plane,” Noah said, laughing. “Honey, we’ve been flying for hours. We need some entertainment!”
“Ladies! If we’re talking about anyone’s not boyfriends on this trip, we’re talking about mine!” Blair said, holding her glass out for one of the attendants to refill. Mere seconds later, Blair lifted a full glass to her lips.
“But we’ve already heard your stories…” Chloe whined, leaning back on the couch.
“Who’s plane is this?” Blair gave Chloe a look and Chloe immediately shut her mouth.
Desiree smiled. Blair had simultaneously taken the focus off Desiree and put Chloe in her place with one sentence. Maybe it was worth coming after all.
Blair smiled back at Desiree. “Don’t take Chloe too seriously. Nobody likes her.”
“I can hear you,” Chloe muttered.
“Kinda the point, B*tch.” Blair said. “Why say something behind someone’s back when you can say it to her face?”
Desiree laughed along with the rest of the group. She drained her glass and held it out like she’d seen Blair do. Not quite as quickly, but with impressive speed nonetheless, she was raising a full glass to her lips.
Blaine dropped into the seat across the table from Desiree.
“Don’t worry about Chloe. She’s been weird ever since we broke up two years ago. I think she’s still got a thing for me.” Blair held her glass out and it was immediately refilled. “Honestly, we weren’t even really dating. I was just bored that weekend.”
“I was the one that broke up with you!” Chloe called from the other side of the plane. Her face was a brilliant shade of pink, from the conversation or the champagne, it was hard to tell.
“In your dreams!” Blair said, blowing Chloe a kiss. Chloe’s blush deepened.
“I’ve been dating Kyle now for six months anyway,” Chloe muttered into her champagne flute.
“Oh my god! I cannot listen to this fight again!” Noah groaned.
Desiree laughed. It was nice. Like being a part of a group again. Something she hadn’t even realized she was missing.
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Post by Free on Oct 29, 2020 14:43:41 GMT -5
Desiree stepped out of the second row of the SUV. It was dark out, but tiny lights lit up the whole house and a deck out back that overlooked the lake. The house was gorgeous. Pine and fir trees surrounded them. The trees were wrong and the lake was too small, but everything still reminded her of Logan and his lake house. How many weekends just like this one had they spent with their friends there?
“No! Whatever it is you’re thinking, stop.” Blair was looking at her, with one hand on the front passenger door.
“What?”
“This weekend is going to be fun. So leave whatever drama is brewing under those gorgeous blue eyes in the car.” Blair slammed her door and started toward the house just as an attendant hurried out to gather their bags.
Desiree forced a smile. Easier said than done.
“Hey Baby!” a guy called as he rounded the corner of the house. It looked like he’d come from the deck out back.
“Paul, what the hell are you doing here?” Blair asked, with one hand on her hip.
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him.
“I thought I’d surprise you!” He smiled down at her.
“I told you this was a girl’s weekend.” Blair forced a smile to her face and grabbed his arm, pulling into the house. “Excuse me ladies while I handle this.”
“Somebody’s in trouble!” Tory sang out, following them into the house.
Everyone else walked into the car, arms empty, except Noah. He carried a small bag.
“I don’t trust them with my toiletries,” Noah explained as he passed Desiree.
Desiree looked back out at the lake. It was hard not to watch it transform into another lake. There was that time they’d all gone even though it’d been storming. She could almost expect to see Brooklyn bouncing toward the lake in a bikini, with Westley and James in tow. She could almost expect Logan to be coming back for her with a drink, wondering why she wasn’t leaving the bags to the staff. Almost.
“I’m not in love with her.”
Desiree’s head jerked in the direction of Chloe’s voice. She’d thought everyone had gone inside.
Chloe played with a piece of her hair. It was a light golden brown that was straightened and fell to just below her shoulders.
“Why do you care what I think?” Desiree asked.
“I-I don’t.” Chloe’s cheeks tinted. “It’s just…you’re new so I didn’t want you to…Blair says stuff some times. I don’t think she realizes…”
“Okay.” Desiree shrugged, grabbed her purse and headed inside. It was obvious Chloe cared, but Desiree didn’t know why and she didn’t care. This weekend marked the start of something new and she hoped she could leave her drama in the car. If only she could leave her memories too.
~
Desiree picked a room overlooking the lake. It was beautifully decorated in whites, grays and blues. She forced the thoughts of Logan from her head, like how if they were at his lake house, they’d be in the master suite. How, wherever she’d gone, that’s always where she’d stayed.
But this was Blair’s house. Blair was in the master suite with Paul right now.
A woman entered with Desiree’s luggage and unpacked everything for her. Desiree watched her, trying to shake off everything before jumping back into the chaos. She felt like a shadow of herself these days, but that was changing this weekend.
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Post by Free on Oct 30, 2020 20:18:11 GMT -5
“I’m sorry! I thought it would be romantic! Excuse me for trying!” Paul’s shouting was muffled but distinct through the double doors leading to Blair’s suite. Trouble in paradise? Desiree smirked. She almost felt bad for him. Almost. If he didn’t know what he had signed up for by now, that was on him.
Desiree looked up from her position on the couch as the doors to Blair’s suite slammed open and Paul stormed out. His face was red. He carried an overnight bag and walked quickly toward the front door, which he slammed behind him. A cloud of Creed Aventus followed him out the door.
Noah dropped into the seat next to Desiree.
“Ooo. Drama! This vacay just got more interesting!” Noah smiled. He leaned back, putting his arm over the back of the couch, looking effortless in one of his signature “sexy suits.”
“Oh come on. Paul looked upset ” Chloe said. She was sitting across from them in an armchair. “Do you think Blair’s okay?”
Noah rolled his eyes. “I am unfortunately in a very committed relationship, so I’ve gotta live vicariously through you b*tches.”
“Noah, do you even own a casual attire?” Tory asked, from the armchair by Chloe.
“For what?” Noah laughed.
“This is supposed to be a relaxing weekend.”
“If you must know, this is casual. Am I wearing a tie?”
“Whatever you say.” Tory laughed.
“That’s right. Whatever I say,” Noah said, smirking. Turning to Desiree, he asked, “So, what’s your story?”
What the hell do you say to that?
“Blair doesn’t take no for an answer, so here I am,” Desiree said. She took a long drink from her whiskey sour. If she was going to live up to the promise she’d made herself for this weekend, she was going to need alcohol and lots of it.
“Yeah, that’s how I ended up in this group too.” Emma dropped on the empty love seat by Noah. “Bartender! I’m starting the night with a piña colada! Make it strong.”
Desiree couldn’t see anyone on Blair’s staff, much less a bartender, but if the people here were even half as attentive as on the ones on Blair’s jet, Desiree had no doubt someone would be bring one post haste.
Blair appeared, her shirt now only half tucked into her skirt. She dropped onto the couch next to Desiree, careful not to spill the dark beverage in her snifter.
Blair held out her glass to Desiree. “Try some. It’s Gautier, and not that crap you buy at the liquor store.”
Desiree knew how to "taste" properly, but also knew she wasn't going to like it, so she went for alcohol content. Desiree took a large sip and Blair grabbed her glass back.
“I said try! You like it, get your own glass.”
“I’m good.” It wasn’t bad, if you like cognac, which Desiree didn’t.
“So…you gonna tell us what happened in there?” Emma asked as someone handed her a piña colada.
“It’s over.” Blair sighed. “He’s too clingy. If I’d wanted him here this weekend, I would have invited him instead of you guys.”
“But I see he left a parting gift?” Tory laughed, obviously referencing the state of Blair’s attire.
“Hey, there were some things he was good at.”
“Are you okay?” Chloe asked quietly.
“B*tch please. Am I ever not?” Blair smiled and drained her glass. Without prompting, someone brought her a tequila sunrise. “Now, to get this party started!” She looked around. “Noah, where is your glass?”
“I was going to see what you had in mind before I committed to joining.”
“He promised Bryan he wouldn’t drink this weekend,” Tory said.
“Tory! I’m pretty sure I also said, ‘keep this to yourself!’” Noah pinched his lips together.
“Then you should have told Chloe.”
Desiree snickered and took another drink.
“Ugh. He’s not on one his ‘cleanses’ again, is he?” Blair rolled her eyes.
“Don’t make fun of him. It makes him happy.” Noah sighed. “What would make me happy is if he left me out of it.”
“You’re not really going to do it, are you?” Blair narrowed her eyes at Noah.
Noah sighed. Loudly. “Yes.”
“Your loss.”
Desiree drained the glass in her hand. Will they just bring me another or I have to ask for it? Before she had time to wonder too much, someone grabbed her empty glass off the coffee table and set another whiskey sour in its place. Desiree smiled. She was impressed. Blair’s people were even better trained than hers.
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Post by Free on Nov 6, 2020 1:19:13 GMT -5
“Oh my god! You just left him like that?” Blair laughed.
Desiree had told the story of her failed one night stand with the guy from Centurion, leaving out the part about Jase.
“His apartment was trying too hard.” Desiree laughed too. The statement was true, but that had very little to do with her real reasons and she wasn’t in the mood to explain those.
“Oh god. I could never do that...” Emma said, taking another sip of her drink.
“That’s because you’re weak,” Tory said.
“Isn’t that uncomfortable? Like for the guy?” Chloe asked, looking at Noah.
“What? Bryan never leaves me unsatisfied.” Noah looked longingly at the drink in Desiree’s hand.
“How is that my problem?” Desiree asked.
Blair put her arm around Desiree, almost spilling both of their drinks. “Just when I thought I couldn’t love you more! We’re like the same person!”
“That’s what this groups needs, another Blair.” Tory rolled her eyes.
“Oh come on, you know you love me!” Blair said, leaning a little harder on Desiree.
Tory stuck out her tongue at Blair, but she was smiling.
Noah yawned. “I’m heading to bed. Perks of being a lawyer: I’m expected to be up with sun.”
“Noooo! Don’t leave us!” Blair said, reaching across Desiree, to grab Noah’s arm as he stood up. He had the benefit of a clear head, so she missed. She pouted.
“Looks like it’s bed time for you too,” he said, laughing.
“Well, are going out on the lake tomorrow and I expect you guys to be at breakfast.” Blair set her snifter on the coffee table and stood up. “Night bitches!”
Everyone responded with some variation of “Good night Blair.”
Desiree stayed on the couch, but everyone but Tory headed off to their respective rooms, after wishing each other good night. Desiree swirled what was left of her drink.
Desiree studied Tory. She wasn’t sure what she’d done, but it didn’t seem like Tory liked her.
Tory dropped into the seat next to Desiree.
“I don’t like new people,” Tory said after a moment. She leaned back against the couch and surveyed the room.
“Normally I don’t either,” Desiree admitted.
Tory smiled. “Guess you’re not so bad though. Night.” Tory light touched a fist to Desiree’s shoulder, polished off what was left in Blair’s glass and headed off to her room.
Desiree watched her leave before heading off to her own room. Tonight had been fun, but it was still so hard to forget, at least when she was alone like now. All the memories of all their trips cascaded down, threatening to crush her.
It was weird too, things not being on her terms. Of their friends, only she and Logan had had any money, so it was always on of their vacation homes or luxury suites they’d paid for.
As she got ready for bed, she wondered if she’d ever really get over him. Would she ever be free? A part of her still didn’t want to and that was probably contributing to her failure.
She briefly wondered where he was right then, whether he still thought of her before shoving aside the thought. It didn’t matter where he was or what he’d done today. It didn’t matter what he thought about.
She sighed and flopped onto the bed someone had turned down for her. Alcohol was supposed to make things fun. Where was the fun now?
She suddenly wished Jase was there. He’d know how to take her mind off things for a while. She smiled at the thought. But she had to be careful. She couldn’t just replace Logan with Jase. Nothing had changed.
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Post by Free on Dec 4, 2020 17:31:26 GMT -5
They’d spent Friday on the water, racing around in Blair’s deck boat and trying to knock each other off the inner tube. Tory held the record for holding on and Blair, the record for knocking people off. Of course only Blair, Noah and Tory had boating licenses, so that part hadn’t been much of a competition. Desiree hadn’t wanted to drive, so she didn’t tell them that she had one too or that she used to drive Logan’s boat at his lake house.
Today (Saturday), they’d started with a hike that ended in a picnic out in this clearing. It had been beautiful with trees and wildflowers everywhere. Members of Blair’s staff were of course the ones carrying everything out there. Blair didn’t do anything halfway. There were blankets, chairs and even tables, along with the food and real plates and utensils.
Now, Emma, Tory and Claire were swimming while Desiree, Blair and Noah lounged in the sun on Blair’s deck chairs.
Jase: You’re not going to believe this.
Desiree: You discovered you can’t live without me for two days?
“Who are you talking to?” Blair asked.
“What?” Desiree looked up from her phone.
“You’ve got this smile on your face. Are you talking to that hottie I meet in your apartment?”
“Jase?”
“Sure.”
Noah leaned toward Desiree. “Yep, it’s Jase.”
Desiree locked her phone. “Noah! Are you drinking?” she asked in mock horror.
“It’s a virgin Bellini,” Noah said with a laugh.
Blair laughed. “Honey, nothing about you is virgin.” She grabbed his glass and took a sip. “Nothing about your drink either.”
Both girls laughed.
“What? It’s not like I’m cheating on him.” Noah said, grabbing his glass back. A look of mock annoyance played across his features.
“Hey lazy people! This is your last chance to enjoy the lake! Get out here!” Tory called from the water.
“I got enough of it yesterday!” Noah called back. He leaned back on his lounge chair and closed his eyes.
“Noah just doesn’t want everyone to know he’s drinking!” Blair called.
“Oh my god!” Noah groaned. “Why did I come on this trip?”
“Because you love me!” Blair said.
“Ooo! Noah’s finally drinking! Yes!” Emma called from the water. “Desiree, you finally get to meet Fun Noah!”
“I’m always fun,” Noah growled.
“Yeah, he sounds super fun.” Desiree snickered.
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Post by Free on Jan 1, 2021 3:05:27 GMT -5
Desiree threw herself back onto her bed with happy sigh. The dark blue duvet beneath her was soft against her cheek.
Home.
Had everywhere felt like home before because she’d carried it with her? She pushed the thought from her mind. It didn’t matter now.
She tried to pretend she hadn’t been disappointed when she’d walked through the door and didn’t see Jase lounging on her couch. It wasn’t like she’d been expecting him. She hadn’t invited him over, but since when did he need an invitation?
She’d left her bags by the door. Jacob would put everything away later. She hadn’t brought anything important. Not on a trip with strangers.
She got up and changed into pajama shorts and a tank.
She’d been surprised by how much fun she’d had, how normal it felt. Life was moving on like everything was fine, the same. Things were only different for her. If she could forget that, or move past it, everything would be better.
Maybe if she could forget Jase too. He was becoming too important. She missed him. He was too transient and she was beyond help when it came to relationships. Even friendship, apparently and she wasn’t entire sure if that’s what Jase was.
She wandered into the living room in the dim light and leaned against the kitchen island.
This new group had welcomed her and she fit. The truth was, she wasn’t sure she wanted to fit. It was like she was standing still and everything was moving way too fast. She didn’t know these people. They didn’t know her. They didn’t have history, for better or worse and there was only one way to cultivate it.
God. Can’t you just say you enjoyed your weekend at the lake with your new friends? Not everything has to be so complicated.
It’s something Jase would say. She tried to smile at the thought, but the action didn’t make it to her lips.
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Post by Free on Jan 3, 2021 1:25:33 GMT -5
“So I noticed you haven’t thrown any parties lately.” It came at her like an accusation, despite his enormous smile.
“Or maybe you just weren’t invited.” Her tone was harsher than she’d intended, but Jase deserved it.
“But I am the party. Without me, you just have a bunch of people standing around not having any fun.”
“And yet we managed it anyway.” She turned her attention back the television. She was over this conversation.
She looked up as he put a hand on her arm.
“What?”
Instead of answering, he held her in some kind of bizarre staring contest.
“It’s not going to work,” she said finally.
“What?” He had this innocent look on his face, but she knew better.
“Has cultivating awkward silences ever worked on me before?”
“Yes?”
“No.” She looked toward the screen again, this time all too aware that he was still watching her.
“Fine,” he said barely audibly as he shifted on the couch.
His head landed in her lap. She was tempted to push him onto the floor, but as tall as he was, he’d only end up there by choice.
“Haven’t really felt like it. Plus, they were more his thing anyway.” She’d said it quietly, almost whispered it and immediately regretted it.
Jase didn’t ask who she meant. He didn’t look back at her with any kind of knowing glance. His gaze was fixed ahead, almost like he hadn’t heard her and for that she was grateful.
A little while later, he rolled onto his back, looking up into her blue eyes. She looked down into his.
“You never told me how things went with Blair and her friends,” he said.
She wanted to be surprised he remembered her name because something inside her was plotting against her, hoping he’d forget Blair for some reason. But that was Jase. He was amazing at remembering people, their names, their faces, their stories.
“Were you popular in high school?” she asked. He must have been. Everyone had always seemed to love him.
“First, I was just as amazing at high school as I am at life, and second, I’m not letting you off that easy.” He laughed. “Maybe you’d know the answer if you hadn’t moved away.”
Something inside her turned to stone as she forced away the memories of why they’d moved. She was tempted to kick him out, but he didn’t know why that was a terrible thing to say. Why am I going easy on Jase?
“It was fine,” she said.
“Fine? That’s what you say about your day at the office - not mine obviously. ‘Oh, it was fine.’” He turned her face toward him with the tip of his finger.
Desiree sighed and silently cursed herself for loving the way it felt to be touched. Though at this moment, she wasn’t sure it was worth the interrogation. Why was she letting him get so close to her again? Because she wanted everything to get so messed up again?
“Well, I had a great weekend. Thanks for asking,” he said, dropping his hand from her face. He rolled back toward the tv.
Desiree looked down at Jase. There was this feeling. Was it guilt? No. Then why did she feel like she owed him more of an explanation? No, that wasn’t right either. It wasn’t that she owed him anything, it was worse than that. It was that despite what she’d been telling herself all night, she wanted to tell him how her weekend at Blair’s had gone.
“Get out,” Desiree said, pushing his head out of her lap.
Jase sat up, smirking. “Is this because I finished the last—”
“Out.”
The smile slipped off his face. “Why?”
“Because this is my apart—”
He rolled his eyes. “We both know that has nothing to do with it...” He sighed, glancing at the floor. “Is this because you don’t want to ask me about my weekend? Talk about yours? Because I let that go... And I don’t care if you want to listen to—”
“What part of what I said was unclear?” Desiree crossed her arms and her lips formed a line.
“Just tell me what I did.”
She was tempted for a moment to be honest, at the very least to say, You did nothing, but it disappeared pretty quickly and was replaced with this itchy feeling and he wasn’t moving fast enough.
“Go,” she said.
He sighed again, glanced at the tv, then back at her like he wanted to say something. Desiree rarely saw him display this level of uncertainty. Like her, he always knew what he wanted. And as far as she knew, he wasn’t afraid of anything.
“Talk to me,” he said quietly and with a gentleness she’d never heard before.
“Do I need to ask someone to escort you out?” There was an edge in her voice. More than was probably necessary, but it helped her feel more in control of the situation.
His eyes turned stormy, emotion hidden there she couldn’t figure out, but he stood.
“Let me know when you’ve decided to be friendly again,” he said, his own edge bothering her more than she wanted to admit.
She kept her expression irritated. He might know her too well, but he wasn’t a minder reader.
With one more look in her direction, he strode away. Her front door slammed after he walked through it.
She sank back onto the couch, turning back toward the tv and telling herself that this was what she wanted or maybe needed. The emptiness she felt when his presence was gone confirmed that she’d made the right call. He was getting too close./color]
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